This line apparently exists somewhere between the MBTA and the TSA. And it is made of frosting.
Perhaps Geoff’s obsession with Zombie Apocalypses and similar things is finally rubbing off on me. Or maybe it’s that the world is going to end a year from now.
I saw this article this morning while I was doing my usual morning news read. Now, I have had my own issues with UPS in recent months, most notably a couple of months ago when I was forced to go out to the UPS facility in Watertown to get a package that should have been delivered to our house. Supposedly they had attempted to deliver a package to our house twice but failed and so left us the little official notice post-it on the front door. On neither occasion did the driver ring the doorbell. Both times we were home. The second day I specifically made sure that I was home so I could get the package. At one point the dogs started barking and so I ran to the front door as fast as I could, getting there in less than 20 seconds, only to watch the truck drive off yet again. I was flabbergasted and furious. Going out to the distribution center and having to stand in line for an hour outside in the rain to get my package because the delivery guy could not expend any real effort trying to get me my package was not my idea of how I wanted to spend a Friday evening.
So it isn’t just me. It isn’t just here. If this is becoming the norm for UPS all over the country, then perhaps they need to examine their business model and figure out what the hell is wrong. And I imagine that laying more people off is not the answer.
Ok, folks. I know we’ve been been married for slightly more than a month and that some of you might find this slightly confusing, so let me lay it out for you.
Mrs. Geoffrey Michael doesn’t live here. In fact, she doesn’t exist.
Mrs. Michael is Geoff’s mom. Or possibly one of Geoff’s two sisters in law. She is patently NOT me.
Mrs. Hopkins is my mother.
I am Ms. Kelly Hopkins.
I did not take Geoff’s last name. I am not going to take Geoff’s last name.
Assuming that I did or that I am going to is ignorant, rude and, at best, old fashioned. I am tired of having to explain over and over again to the same people that I am still, and shall remain, Ms. Kelly Hopkins. Interestingly, Geoff’s tired of it as well. He’s also completely fine with the fact that I kept my name and we’re the only two people in the whole world to whom this should matter. Hm. Funny how that works.
For those of you who were at the wedding and were paying attention we were consistently announced as Geoff and Kelly. At no point were we announced as Mr. & Mrs. Michael. There was a reason for that.
From this point forward mail addressed to Mrs. Geoffrey Michael, Geoffrey & Kelly Michael, or Mr. & Mrs. Geoffrey Michael shall be returned to sender unopened.
I am offended that people so casually disregard my intent and my very identity. This is who I am, who I choose to be, and who I shall remain. If you have a problem with it, keep it to yourself.
Comments are not allowed on this post. This is not open for discussion and this is not up for debate.
~Ms. Kelly Hopkins
ETA: The home phone is now working and is static free for the first time in weeks. The internet is intermittent and has decided, seemingly all by itself, that it will only work wirelessly, when it wants to work at all. Verizon guy, who was very nice and extremely competent, fixed a bunch of things and is working on getting us a replacement modem for our ancient DSL modem. So, for the time being, if you need to get in touch with us please follow the standard order of operations: home phone, text message, cell phone. Thanks!
I’m posting from Geoff’s phone right now. Verizon
failed and our internet has crapped out. Our home phone is finally working again, but we are not sure how long that will last. If you need to get in touch with us please send us a text, call the home line, and as a last resort call our cell phones as we, especially Geoff, get almost no reception in the house.
A friend of mine posted this elseweb and I had to pass this along.
I particularly like the inclusion of Spiderman on this chart. And the Spanish Inquisition. Nobody expects the Spanish Inquistition!
Ahem. Sorry, that was a gimmie.