Well. I had wondered why they called this episode “The Door”.

I really didn’t know.

I had suspected that it would have something to do with the door to the House of Black and White, or maybe the door to the Great Sept of Baelor, or something along those lines.  The actual meaning and significance of the name, and which door it meant, is something I could never have guessed in a million years.

And so I really, really, didn’t see it coming until it was happening, and then suddenly the pieces fell into place in my head as Meera Reed was screaming “HOLD THE DOOR!” at Hodor.

Oh, God.  This is happening, and what’s more, it was meant to be.  As the Three-Eyed Raven said, the ink has already dried, this has already happened.  All along, Bran was the reason young Wylis became Hodor.  To get Bran further along, to get him where he needed to be, and to protect him just a little longer.  This has been Hodor’s purpose all along, much like Jojen Reed’s purpose and Osha the wildling’s purpose.  And sadly, it appears to have been Summer’s purpose as well. 

This is why the books and the show are both so very very good, so incredibly addicting and compelling, and yet so very terrible (in the original sense of the word) at the same time.  It is very, very well done, and this episode is really one of the best ones the show has done in ages.  But at what a cost.

Even without the sacrifice and death of the last few minutes, this episode would have been extraordinarily momentous.  In what I honestly expected to be the most important reveal of the show (instead of one astonishing one after another), we discovered that the White Walkers were deliberately created [?!?!?!] by the Children of the Forest during their great conflict with Men thousands of years ago.

Buuuuhhhh-whuuuuuuuu?!?!?

Honestly, that is really the sort of thing I would have rather figured out from reading the books.  I hope George finishes The Winds of Winter by Christmas or something.  No pressure, George, just starting to get a little antsy.

We see Ser Jorah finally reveal his love to Daenerys, as he also reveals his fatal Greyscale infection.  Man, that was a great scene.

We see Daenerys ride out of Vaes Dothrak with her massive army.  Oh, you stupid masters of Astapor and Yunkai.  Tyrion wasn’t kidding when he said this would be the best deal you got.  If you shaft him on this (and I fully expect them to do just that), I expect a massive horde of Dothraki to annihilate the rest of Slaver’s Bay, maybe with some dragons and Unsullied to help out too.  Good.  They deserve it.

More talk about the other houses of the North, and so now maybe we will finally see the Manderlys and White Harbor.  Oh, this is going to be SO awesome.  Die Boltons Die.

Then there’s the Ironborn.  [deep breath, and a sigh]

We now know why the Greyjoy storyline exists, apparently.  Ships for Dany.

Well, cheer up, Emo Vikings, maybe your existence is not so purposeless and pointless after all.  Maybe you will have the ships to get Dany where she needs to be.  Although I really hope that Euron dies in spectacular fashion before he gets anywhere close to her.  In fact, I kind of wish someone would make the Iron Islands the Bikini Atoll of Westeros.  I am just sick of them, frankly.

And they have the lamest crown I have ever seen.  That’s your crown, guys?  Really?  It looks like Euron went down to some crappy tourist-trap shop in Hyannis and bought his crown there.  I guess the Ironborn not only do not sow, they cannot carve, either.  Not even whittling, huh?  By the old gods and the new, you guys really are pathetic.  It was sad enough when you put your dead king in a lobster trap and then pushed him out into the surf.  Hope Balon gets you some nice lobsters at least.

But that crown is so awful, it’s mind boggling.  It’s like Euron found something my dachshund left on the lawn, shaped it, shellacked it, and put it on his head.  At least “Burrow Hound Poop Crown” has a nice rhythm to it.  Your so-called Driftwood Crown looks like something a four-year old found on the beach and managed to get in the house when Mommy wasn’t looking.  Forget the Kingsmoot, I think the next king should be whoever can make a crown that actually looks half-decent.  That will probably take you a while you Emo Viking weirdos.

Anyway, on a different note, I have to admit I am really starting to like the whole idea of Brienne and Tormund getting together.  It’s just too awesome to pass up.

Arya’s sideshow in Braavos just seems to get dragged out longer and longer.  I am wondering what her purpose is going to be in regards to the conclusion of the main storylines, or if she is just going to be some weird tangent.  I no longer have any idea.  Maybe that’s because my brain partially melted last night.  Come on, a man needs to know where this story is going.

I really like these newly reimagined Children of the Forest.  They look really, really awesome.  And it’s interesting to see how even they do not neatly fall into good or evil, black or white.  They are supposed to be ancient and wise, and yet they created the greatest threat the world has ever seen, and they have no way to control it anymore.  And so they try to help fight them.  And holy crap, did they not have any scouts out or something?  No one noticed the gigantic wight army until it was literally on their (no pun intended) doorstep?  Damn.

So yeah, that ending.  Wow.  We lost the Three-Eyed Raven, Leaf and some other Children of the Forest, Summer, and Hodor.  Only two direwolves left now, Ghost and Nymeria, whom we haven’t seen in the last five seasons.  Man that is depressing.

That’s about all I can handle for a while.  Maybe more later.

-Geoff

 

 

 

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