Dear, Death;

Please go on a vacation.

As a general rule I’m a fan of seasons changing, I understand the cycle of life quite well, I understand the need for you, Death.  But you’ve been visiting my family, friends, and pets a little too much this year and, well, I’m wondering if perhaps you can go away for a little while?

The tally so far this year (we’re talking calendar 2015) goes like this:

January: Rerun, our Dachshund

February: My Great Uncle

May: Jay, our friend

June: My sister and her dog, Jasmine; My Great Aunt

July: Geoff’s Great Uncle

September: An amazing musician who I admired and was a friend to so many, Tom; our friend’s cat, Lolly

October: The father of one of Geoff’s police officer friends.

By my count that’s 7 people, 1 cat, and 2 dogs.  That’s 2 months in which we didn’t lose someone, not counting November which is only 3 days old.  I’m also not counting the coworker who lost his dad, my manager’s cat, and other tertiary people I didn’t actually know.

So, Death, can we call it a vacation at least through the end of the year?  I can think of some politicians you could visit.  And some government officials and captains of industry/”job creators” in various places around the world that clearly need you.  We should have a chat, you and I.  Call me if you like this idea, you obviously know how to be in touch.

~Kelly