Please go on a vacation.
As a general rule I’m a fan of seasons changing, I understand the cycle of life quite well, I understand the need for you, Death. But you’ve been visiting my family, friends, and pets a little too much this year and, well, I’m wondering if perhaps you can go away for a little while?
The tally so far this year (we’re talking calendar 2015) goes like this:
January: Rerun, our Dachshund
February: My Great Uncle
May: Jay, our friend
July: Geoff’s Great Uncle
September: An amazing musician who I admired and was a friend to so many, Tom; our friend’s cat, Lolly
October: The father of one of Geoff’s police officer friends.
By my count that’s 7 people, 1 cat, and 2 dogs. That’s 2 months in which we didn’t lose someone, not counting November which is only 3 days old. I’m also not counting the coworker who lost his dad, my manager’s cat, and other tertiary people I didn’t actually know.
So, Death, can we call it a vacation at least through the end of the year? I can think of some politicians you could visit. And some government officials and captains of industry/”job creators” in various places around the world that clearly need you. We should have a chat, you and I. Call me if you like this idea, you obviously know how to be in touch.